At the beginning of this year, I loudly and confidently announced to everyone that I was finally going to lose my chubby belly and get back to the flat abs I had years ago.
PREMIUM “Today, fitness goals include positivity, but I think the world could do without it,” Ashish says. “The body doesn’t care how much motivational quote you ingest, and your abs won’t show up because you visualized them so hard.” (Image: Adobe Stock)
I was confident that with enough discipline, a proper diet, and a strict training regimen, I would be walking around proudly in no time.
Those abs haven’t shown yet. Just to be clear, it’s not for lack of trying. I spent time, following a routine, and searching self-help literature to find new tricks to help me solve the mystery of my missing six-pack. Still, I stand calmer than I had planned.
I was gently warned. Dr. Ruchira Tendulkar, the sports fitness expert at my gym, tried to temper my expectations. “It’s going to take time,” she said.
I was telling her about the literature I was reading, the new tricks I had discovered, and the ambitious goals I had set for myself.
In other words, I was quoting from the self-help industrial complex. This multi-million dollar industry is based on the idea that all you need to accomplish your goals is willpower and a multi-step program.
Every element of this industry, from books and vlogs to reels and videos, has a message: “You get it?” It’s that simple. You can do it too! ”
Spoiler alert: No, I couldn’t. My slow metabolism is simply a medical fact. No force of will can change that. I battled this fact as I pursued the goals I set for myself. I adjusted my diet, added supplements, and meticulously followed a grueling exercise schedule, even when my body and mind needed rest.
It seemed like the more I tried to “hack” my body, the less cooperative it became. It was as if my metabolism had developed a rebellious tendency.
I went from determination to frustration to enjoyment. Your body doesn’t care how many motivational quotes you consume, and your abs won’t show up because you visualized hard enough.
I started admitting to myself what everyone thinks they know at their core. Fitness influencers are actually targeting a much smaller demographic: people at a certain stage in life and with a certain assumed level of fitness. A little off topic, but I wish they would acknowledge this so their constant positivity doesn’t feel like they’re mocking the viewers’ continued struggles.
For my part, I will admit that my fitness journey has been more like a long, slow hike than a race. There, the destination is always out of sight, but at least one is on the right path.
I am happy to admit that Dr. Tendulkar was right. It takes time. There is nothing you can do to change this situation. At least, nothing healthy or sustainable.
There’s something liberating about finally letting go of the relentless pursuit of a six-pack.
Now you can enjoy the process of becoming healthier. My workouts became something I looked forward to instead of a mad dash toward an unrealistic goal. I love how my body feels stronger and more capable, even if my abs aren’t working yet.
Maybe this was the lesson I needed. Even in the age of AI, some things take time. That not everything is under my control.
Sometimes the best hack is to stop hacking and slow down. Thank you for the journey. Time is a wonderful gift in itself. Why cram every minute with tasks and expectations when you can just have fun?
Now that I’m over 50, I’ve learned that the secret isn’t to “win the race.” It’s really about always quitting the race.
(Charles Assisi is a co-founder of Founding Fuel. He can be reached at assisi@foundingfuel.com)
